Robert E. Lee is an American hero. The noble life he lived serves as an everlasting model for the way everyone should live. What follows is the rarely told story of a man born of great Virginian heritage and prestige. A man who served over 30 years in the U.S. army, who saved St. Louis from the mighty Mississippi, and who never wavered from doing what he thought was right, and what he thought to be God’s will for him. Lee may best be known for the four years he wore gray, but the very best of the man may well be seen through his life of service which began as a mere boy . . .
Born in the same room in which the two Lee signers of the Declaration of Independence were born, Robert Edward Lee came into the world bearing great expectations on January 19, 1807. The Lees of Virginia had descended from the Great Richard Lee I, called “the emigrant,” who planted in the ‘northern neck’ in 1641. His mother’s family, the Carters, also hailed from a prestigious background and therefore both the Carters and the Lees had held dominant positions in Virginia’s ruling class since the 1640s. Both belonged to the politically and socially influential planter aristocracy of the South. Among Lee’s ancestors were members of Virginia’s colonial House of Burgesses, members of Congress, a cabinet official, several governors of Virginia, diplomats and military officers, and the before mentioned signers of the Declaration of Independence.
Named after his mother’s brothers, Robert and Edward, Lee was the youngest of five children born at Stratford Hall, his family’s plantation home in Westmoreland County, Va. His father, Revolutionary war hero, Henry “Light Horse Harry” Lee, was a natural soldier, but was warm and delightful with the children. Despite his father’s difficulties with debt and poor business practices, Robert and his siblings enjoyed a happy childhood. His mother, Anne Carter, was religiously devoted and taught them the importance of regular worship and prayer at an early age. Thus the Lee children took pleasure in the simple things. One of Lee’s earliest memories was of a Chestnut tree he helped his mother plant in the driveway at Stratford Hall. Lee developed a sensitive appreciation for nature and he enjoyed the outdoors. His childhood interests included following the hunt (specifically the fox hunt on foot), and horses, especially training them.
Young Robert had dark brown hair and dark eyes, and was sweet natured and very contained like his mother. Separated from his father (in jail for his debts) at age 6, Lee did not inherit many of his father’s temperaments except his courage and his strong and well proportioned body. However, the oral history of the Lees of the past, along with his father’s glory of another time, made up the tales of his family’s golden age which exerted a powerful influence in his formative years. He also grew up under the influence of George Washington, who was not only a hero to Lee, but was also a man of the times, then dead only 12 years in 1811 when Robert was four. Because of his father’s personal friendship and his family’s intimate association with Washington, he was a family figure to Lee as a child. The development of Lee’s character, however, is to be credited most of all to his mother, who instilled the values of respect, self control, prudence, responsibility, and service.
Lee’s life of service began at an early age while caring for his mother who became sick and eventually an invalid. Taking on the responsibilities of his father, Lee developed an instinctive sense of responsibility and matured early and soberly. He became very prudent with his money, never forgetting the value of a dollar and never deviating from his training of self denial and self control. In fact, Lee’s brother also disgraced the family with scandal and further instilled in him a strict adherence to the values instilled in him by his mother. He therefore developed a custodial sense of his family’s traditions and the Lee name, especially at age 11 when his father died.
By age 13, when Lee was entering his first school in 1820, he was seen as the man of the family, doing the shopping and the meals, and leading carriage rides for his mother. He would carry her to the carriage and then set the cushions to her liking. Lee took care of his mother well, and he always tried to amuse her.
Lee was an exemplary student and had good relations with his teachers. One of Lee’s early mentors, Benjamin Howell, who taught Lee at a preparatory school, wrote, “He was a most exemplary student in every respect. He was never behind time at his studies; never failed in a single recitation; was perfectly observant of the rules and regulations of the institution; was gentlemanly, unobtrusive, and respectful in all his deportment to teachers and fellow students. His specialty was finishing up. He imparted a finish and a neatness, as he proceeded, to everything he undertook. One of the branches of mathematics he studied with me was conic sections, in which some of the diagrams are very complicated. He drew the diagrams on a slate; and although he well knew that the one he was drawing would have to be removed to make room for another, he drew eachŹone with as much accuracy and finish, lettering and all, as if it was to be engraved and printed...” (Lattimore 5).
West Point
With no real prior interest in arms, there is nothing to suggest why Lee decided on a military career and its possible that due to his mother’s limited financial means, the choices of professions were fairly limited to the army or navy. He chose West Point probably because of his father’s proud history in the army (Dowdy 41). In March of 1824, Lee received his appointment to West Point from Secretary of War John C. Calhoun and entered the academy at age 18 in 1825. It didn’t take long for Lee to excel as he made the list of “Distinguished Cadets” (top five students of each class) his first year. He also received the highest non-commissioned rank of staff sergeant for his uniform excellence in performing all his duties.
Lee began his third year taking scientific courses that led to engineering. To Lee, engineering offered a profession within a profession of the army. During his last year, Lee became the outstanding cadet of his time at West Point. He was appointed the Corps Adjutant- the highest rank a cadet could attain- and only one cadet could earn it. He won the honor not as the first student in his class (although he was near the top in all of his subjects). The honor was awarded him on the general excellence of his standing in all phases of academy life and his position of natural leadership among his fellows. Lee was the first cadet to graduate without receiving a single demerit despite very rigid and strict regulations. He was second in his class and was the top cadet. Despite his success, Lee was beyond causing any envy in his contemporaries because it came so natural to him. He had a wholeness that was rare even in that day when the man of virtue was the model (Dowdy 46).
As an honor graduate, Lee had the privilege of choosing the branch of service that he wanted to be commissioned and therefore chose the Engineer Corps upon graduating in 1829.
Family life
Instead of celebrating with his fellow cadets after graduation, Lee returned home and became his mother’s full time nurse as she was dying. Once again, Lee committed his energies to service, and was there for his mother right up until the moment she died, a vision that would stay with him as he recalled it years later.
Lee would become the first generation of Lees in Virginia who would be dependent on what he could earn away from the plantation and the family’s money. But the plantation dream was in him, and Stratford remained his spiritual home, and a goal became that of reclaiming it.
Despite the loss of his mother, Lee tried to get on with his life and attended to his first engineering assignment which took him to Cockspur Island in the Savannah River in Georgia where he assisted with the building of Fort Pulaski. When not required on the job, Lee found pleasant diversion in Savannah, where he met many people through his West Point friend, Jack Mackay.
In 1831, Lee was transferred to Fort Monroe, Va., where he subsequently courted childhood friend Mary Custis, daughter of George Washington’s adopted son, George Washington Parke Custis. At age 24, and a little less than two years older than Mary, Lee married the Washington descendent in June 1831 at Arlington. Despite his interest in pretty ladies, there is nothing to indicate that Lee was ever involved with a woman of any kind before his marriage. He had never shown serious attention to any other girl.
Instead of depending on her family’s wealth, Lee insisted that he and Mary, who was the heiress of Arlington, should live entirely on his army pay and were to live at the site of Ft. Monroe.
Their first child, G.W. Custis, was born in 1832. Lee became a natural father, a good parent like his mother had been. By 1846, they had seven children, three boys and four girls. Lee was passionately devoted to his children, despite having to spend long periods of time away from them as a soldier. Through much written correspondence, Lee passed along his guidance to the children. To his oldest son, Custis, Lee once wrote: “The full play of your young and growing powers, the daily exercise of all your energies, the consciousness of acquiring knowledge, and the pleasure of knowing your efforts to do your duty, will bring you a delight and justification far surpassing all that idleness and selfishness can give. Try it fairly and take your own experience...hold yourself above every mean action. Be strictly honorable in every act, and be not ashamed to do right. Acknowledge right to be your aim and strive to reach it (Lattimore 10).”
Lee and his wife, Mary, would often go out in the evening, and son Rob vividly recalled the impression of seeing them depart. His father was always in full uniform and always ready, waiting for Mrs. Lee, who was generally late. “He would chide her gently, in a playful way, and with a bright smile. He would then bid us goodbye and I would go to sleep with this beautiful picture in my mind, the golden epaulets and all-chiefly the epaulets.”
With the younger children, he liked to romp and play, joke with them, and tell them stories. He loved to have the bottoms of his feet tickled, and he removed his house slippers, placed his feet in one of the children’s laps, and told stories as long as the child would tickle his feet. He showed an intense interest in their studies, their failures and their triumphs, and gave them, his youngest son recalled, “kind, sensible, useful” guidance. As he had been taught by his mother, so he taught his children the virtues of application, to do the very best they could. With each of his daughters he was a doting parent, and clearly he wanted the boys to excel (Dowdy 99).
With much financial obligation with seven children, Lee was worried about being able to pay on his army salary, and for a period of time, considered leaving the service. He therefore worked carefully at the management of expenditures, stressing the avoidance of extravagance, waste, and indulgence. His only personal indulgence were in fine uniforms, as he was meticulous about his appearance, and he always rode good horses. Horseback riding was his favorite outdoor pastime. He simply liked the act of riding, aimlessly, without objective (Dowdy 74).
Over the next 12 years, from 1832-1844, (age 27-39) Lee learned the treadmill of army routine and was frustrated at slow advancement in the engineers. Lee went to the engineering department in Washington and during his time at the headquarters he became depressed and bored with the politics that went on there. It really tested his self control and he detested office work.
St. Louis and the Mississippi River
Finally, in 1837 at age 30, Lee left the East Coast to take an assignment he desperately wanted in order to get away from office work. In what would be his first major engineering job, Lee was to work with the Mississippi River in St. Louis, as its changing currents threatened the city (Dowdy 63). The assignment, which proved his perseverance, would become the most important of his engineering jobs. Lee endured much criticism from the town of St. Louis for his slow thoroughness during the first year of work on the river. Even so, Lee worked along side the civilian workers and ate with them, gaining much respect for his nature, free of any need for self assertion. St. Louis city mayor John F. Darby remembered that “he maintained and preserved under all circumstances his dignity and gentlemanly bearing, winning and commanding the esteem, regard and respect of every man under him.” Lee’s family joined him there in St. Louis during his second and third years of work. In 1840, Lee was recalled from his nearly completed work in St. Louis, which saved the city as a port.
The shaping traits of Lee
In 1841 Capt. Lee (a title earned in 1838) did various work on fortifications in North Carolina and New York and moved to Ft. Hamilton in New York Harbor, where he remained from age 34-39, which was a calm period for him. Lee served as a vestryman at the church of Ft. Hamilton.
Lee was a regular reader of the daily newspaper and liked to read history, although he steered clear of politics. He also held a strong interest in the practical aspects of farming. Lee did display an interest in pretty ladies, but he also believed in man’s role as protector of them and of honor (Dowdy 74). He was known especially for his gentleness and care for others.
Like his father, Lee was a striking figure. By age 20, his contemporaries began to refer to his “manly beauty” and superb carriage. Alexander Stephens referred to him as “the most manly and entire gentleman I ever saw.” Lee had a magnificent physique, an athletic figure, and handsome features. He maintained his physique by regular exercise and orderly living. Lee never used tobacco, and rarely took even a single glass of wine. Before the Mexican war, a lady in Virginia gave him a bottle of whiskey for which he commented, “she thought I could not get on without. I carried that bottle all through the war without having had the slightest occasion to use it, and on my return home I sent it back to my good friend, that she might be convinced that I could get on without liquor.”
He abhorred smoking and in a letter to his son Rooney, wrote, “I was sorry to see, from your letter to your mother, that you smoke occasionally. It is dangerous to meddle with. You have in store so much better employment for your mouth. Reserve it, Roon, for its legitimate purpose. Do not poison and corrupt it with stale vapors, or tarnish your beard with their stench” (Lattimore 11).
Lee hated wasting anything and was very efficient throughout his works as an engineer. Lee was a simple man and it showed through his advice to his son Rooney when he was married, “As you have commenced, I hope you will continue never to exceed your means. It will save you much anxiety and mortification, and enable you to maintain your independence of character and feeling. It is easier to make our wishes conform to our means than our means conform to our wishes. In fact, we want but little. Our happiness depends upon our independence, the success of our operation, prosperityŹof our plans, health, contentment, and the esteem of our friends” (Bradford 19).
Baptized as a child, Lee was an Episcopalian. In church, sitting very straight, he would often become drowsy and nap during the sermon, much to the surprise and horror of his son Rooney.
The Mexican War
Twenty-one years after his time at West Point, Lee still had not had any experience as a soldier. Finally on August 19, 1846, Lee reported to Mexico for war where he engaged in engineering and reconnaissance work that included road and bridge building. After the first year, he was summoned by General in Chief Winfield Scott to take on a more active role in the war where by his forthcoming reconnaissance work brought him overnight fame. Lee went from peacetime engineer to the most celebrated junior officer in Scott’s army at age 40.
In March 1847, Lee had his first experience with directing military actions and coming under fire from the enemy at the three day bombardment of Vera Cruz. Through his letters home to Mary, it appeared that Lee was unaware of his own danger when under fire. He seemed simply unafraid. This is thought to have been caused by Lee’s implicit belief in the will of God. Objective minded, he concentrated on the knows, the tangibles, and the certainty that God would rule his destiny (Dowdy 83). He simply aimed to do the best he could and to always do it according to God’s will. He also never mentioned his own success, for which many others did.
During his Mexican War campaigns, Lee’s reconnaissance work was heralded greatly by Scott and his officers. He was recognized for his coolness under fire and was steadily promoted for his skill, valor, and undaunted courage. His contributions were highly valuable to the success that the U.S. had in Mexico, which eventually led to the acquisition of land in Texas, California, and New Mexico.
Lee did endure a flesh wound during one of the battle engagements that led to the opening of Mexico City. Lee paid no attention to it, and willed his way through various assignments until he eventually fainted and fell from his saddle. It was, however, another act in particular that would place him lastingly at the very top of soldiers in Scott’s estimation: Lee successfully delivered battle plans back to General Scott at night over hardened lava fields in the midst of thunderstorms when seven other engineer officers had failed to make it. After the war, Scott said, “Lee is the greatest military genius in America, and if I were on my deathbed tomorrow, and the president of the United States should tell me that a great battle was to be fought for the liberty or slavery of the country, and asked my judgement as to the ability of my commander, I would say, with my dying breath, let it be Robert E. Lee.”
Regarding his duty in Mexico, Lee said, “I am but doing my duty, and with me, in small matters as well as in large ones, duty must come before pleasure.” He did, however, show a great appreciation for the Mexican landscape. On his way back to Arlington in May of 1848, he gained a high esteem for the countryside and “beautiful country” which gave him a rare perspective of America.
Lee now had become the most famous soldier under general rank in the army and ironically, through conversation and letter was quoted as being, “a peacemaker by nature” by Henry Hunt, his friend from Fort Hamilton. He gained this dubbing for his desire to heal the differences between General Scott and some of his subordinate officers. With this persona, Lee would return to a peaceful, routine engineering life.
Leading West Point
After a short time of enjoyable reacquaintance with his family at Arlington, Lee accepted a new assignment in Baltimore, beginning in September of 1848. Lee took the family and supervised the construction of a new harbor fortŠ Fort Carroll.
Then, in 1852, Lee became Superintendent of West Point Academy and excepted the position with extreme humbleness. He enjoyed every aspect of his life as superintendent except the confinement to an office. However, he proved himself as a highly able administrator as efficiency and discipline was at its best during his tenure. Lee watched over the drill, discipline, and studies of the cadets, who were one day to become officers of the army.
West Texas
At age 48, Lee was reluctant to leave his family again, especially the girls who needed the presence of their father. But, Lee was called once again to the West in April 1855 to take his first field command. So he left West Point to become lieutenant colonel in the 2nd Calvary, one of the newly created calvary regiments. Lee was happy to be getting back into a more active role, career wise, but said, “My happiness can never be advanced by my separation from my wife, children and friends” (Dowdy 103).
Lee then spent two years away from his family at Camp Cooper in Texas for what was the loneliest time in his life. After his stint in Texas, Lee came home to find Mary partially crippled by arthritis and in much pain. Her father had also died, so Lee took care of her once again, filling the role of caretaker and service provider.
Resurrecting Arlington
With the passing of his father-in-law, Lee was now burdened with managing his estate which forced him to be absent from the army for two years. At age 50, he became a planter and meticulously untangled the mess of the estate and run down condition of Arlington. Slowly, but surely, Lee rehabilitated Arlington through a master plan, rebuilding structures and replanting fields to bring in much needed cash to pay off debts. Lee did not enjoy the depressing nature of this salvage work on the estate, but did bring order to it, making it run efficiently (Dowdy 14).
Around this time, Lee was called up to suppress a slave uprising at Harper’s Ferry and assume command of the force. He suppressed the riot and was sent back to Texas where he became depressed and weary about his career in the army, lack of advancement and pay, and being away from home and family again...Lee carried a sense of failure about his career (Dowdy 122-3).
Impending Secession
As states began to secede, Lee was called back to Washington at the possibility that General Scott might begin a campaign against the South. Lee believed that the differences could and should be resolved within the republic and said, “Succession is nothing but revolution.” Yet, if the secession movement was opposed by force, he added, “a Union that can only be maintained by swords and bayonets, and in which strife and civil war are to take the place of brotherly love and kindness, has no charm for me. I shall mourn for my country and for the welfare and progress of mankind. If the Union is dissolved, and the government disrupted, I shall return to my native state, and share the miseries of my people, and save in defense will draw my sword on none.”
Lee had been taught that his first allegiance belonged to his mother state of Virginia. He devoutly hoped that a peaceful agreement could be made, but under no circumstance could he fight against Virginia’s sons. Stating his opposition to conflict, Lee hoped that President Buchanan “will be able to extinguish fanaticism North and South, cultivate love for country and Union, and restore harmony between the different sections” (Bradford 19).
Because he could not fight against his home state, Lee resigned from the army in 1861. Consequently, he had sacrificed his career of over 30 years in the U.S. army and his future for a war which he believed to be unnecessary and which he felt no cause (Dowdy 135). Explaining this, Lee said, “With all my devotion to the Union and the feeling of loyalty and duty as an American citizen, I have not been able to make up my mind to raise my hand against my relatives, my children, and my home.”
sources:
Dowdey, Clifford. “1965” Lee.
Bonanza Books: New York.
Bradford, Gamaliel. “1912”
Lee the American.
Houghton Mifflin: Boston.
Lattimore, Ralston B. “1974”
The story of Robert E. Lee.
Colortone Press: Washington, D.C. 
